Juliet Clark @semidetached@myna.social

My neighbour called round to see if I had any Blu-Tack in the house. He said he had a picture of a magnificent leopard and he wanted to put it up on his cupboard. He asked me whether I’d ever heard a cheetah purr. I said no. He had though, on the radio in Canada.

The butcher is recommending a cut of pork loin to the thin lipped elderly woman with the big black canvas shopping bag and frown. He waves a large knife over it in the display counter, “That’ll be lovely, tender as a woman’s heart!” he says. “I’ll have the sausages” says the woman.