nicole @nicole@myna.social

I was in #Chinatown #LosAngeles a couple of nights ago when my friend Ra (she/her) bummed a cigarette off of a stranger. While they chatted, I wandered a little ways off with our party’s third.

After a few minutes, it was clear that the conversation between Ra and Mister Cigarette had become heated. I rushed over to provide Ra with support, only to find her staring down Mr. Cigarette as he unfurled an anti-trans screed—one that was disturbingly premised on prison rape analogies. 🥺

I stayed in the conversation just long enough to realize that neither rationality nor empathy had a place, and then gently guided Ra away and onto a better night.

Meanwhile, our party’s third, snapped a few photos of what being an ally can look like.

#photography #trans

Awww. A little one stopped by my table to compliment my hair clips. Love the mini wins. 🥰

My greatest presentation successes to date are avoiding gendered titles entirely, basking in the radioactive background noise of the “sirs” and “ma’ams” around me, while fending off only the occasional targeted “you.”.

Arriving at #SFO at 15:00 on a weekday is my new favorite travel hack.

Absolutely empty. No lines. No waits. Just a quiet corner table at the reasonably overpriced wine bar.

Two hours later: the zoo fills.

Brown Sugar is just sugar mixed with molasses. 😘

If you don’t know what a popover is, or you’ve never had a good one, I weep for you. I’ve made them so many times that I don’t even need a recipe.

The same can’t be said for the cookies: the recipe my mother used came from her mother who usually sourced her recipe’s from her friends and her bridge club.

My grandmother passed earlier this year. I hadn’t spoken with her, or anyone else on that side for years. Originally, this was because of a legal battle over her estate, of which I was trustee for a time; in the final year, because I’d come out as trans, and that was a few bridges too far for their brand of 1950’s liberalism.

Thankfully, I was able to find a recipe online that lined up well with my memory of the key ingredients. I made them last night, and the results were deeply soothing.

Highly recommended.

https://www.goodlifeeats.com/recipe-exchange-chocolate-gingerbread/

My father’s family was Jewish. If my mother’s family ever had a religion, they chose not to share it with their children. Neither of my parents were even the slightest bit religious.

Holidays at my parent’s house were crow-assembled: bits and bobs of different traditions—nothing sacred, nothing pure; nothing consistent from one year to the next.

So, when the holidays come up over the horizon, I don’t have a lot of rituals to cling to. The tidings I crave are really just two baked goods that were usually to be found in my parents’ kitchen around the end of the year:

1. chocolate gingerbread cookies (light on the ginger, heavy on the cloves);
2. popovers.