Apologies in advance for the vaguetoot, but... well...

Some days, sometimes, it becomes really clear how impossible it is, due to the weird intersection and interaction of a few microidentities I have, for me to be able to quietly and unremarkably live my life the way I wish I could. Being altersex, and particularly altersex in the way I am, is hard. Being on the ace spectrum is hard.

Trying to make those two things work together publicly in an allosexual society? Simply impossible.😥

@Impossible_PhD I feel this. Often people think you’re presenting as a lure, when you’re just manifesting yourself.

@nicole Dear fucking god, yes. And when you're like, "please don't do that," they take active offense, because they feel entitled to the lure.

@Impossible_PhD exactly. It’s a very female problem, and a corallary to,“she wouldn’t have dressed that way if she didn’t want that attention.” 🤮

@nicole I feel *very fucking deeply* that exact thing.

There are midpoints, small things I can do that put me closer to the body I wish I could have, but people read *things* into it, and I'm quite confident they'd treat me very weirdly as a result. Hence the "could never be left in peace" part.

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@Impossible_PhD and being ace is a multiplier, of course. Not least of all because, depending on where you are on that spectrum, other people’s impulses can feel extremely _alien_.

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myna.social

Basic models of flocking behavior are controlled by three simple rules: 1) separation: avoid crowding neighbours (short range repulsion); 2) alignment: steer towards average heading of neighbors; 3) cohesion: steer towards average position of neighbors (long range attraction). With these three simple rules, the flock moves in an extremely realistic way.